Dosti

"Yaron yahi dosti hai...kismat mein jo mili hai"....so sang Junoon. One of my favorite songs with good music and good, meaningful lyrics. And truly friendship is that elixir which keeps the spirit alive. Yes family is there for you every time, even when friends are not there, but you can talk about only so much things with them. I won't discuss the importance of family here as i know that it sure as hell can't be discussed. It can only be felt. But friendship is different. You spend the majority of the waking day with your friends. Lets face it, its the friends that have to deal with our every mood swing of the day and yet try and cope with it somehow and on top of it make us feel comfortable and loved. In short, Friendship is the heart and soul of every human being. So what is it that makes people say 'Friends for Life' or 'Best Friends Forever'?

For that to happen the person must have developed a special place in your life. That's the first and foremost requirement. You must have enough faith in the person to tell him/her all your fears and share all your happiness. You can be rest assured of their being there for you when you need them and vice-versa. They are happy to see you happy and they are sad to see you sad. That's what best friends are made of. They have an uncountable and never ending reserve of support. That some people can actually understand everything that their friends want to say without actually saying it is simply special. That to me is certainly a form of divinity. I have seen many close friendships in my life and for a long time i longed for them to be in my life too and god blessed me with that not once, not twice but thrice. I say that because each time i got separated from my best friend for reasons i had no control over, but did get back together again later on somehow.

I might be wrong here but i feel that close friendship shouldn't have any boundaries. You must be able to say what you want to at any point in time and place and expect the same thing to happen to you too. Friendship is a treasure that increases if you distribute it. You can not hoard it or lock it for yourself. It's always out in the open and for every one to see. If you become too controlling or start dictating too much much, you will stifle it. It needs sunlight and fresh air to survive, much like the sunflower. Of course there are sacrifices to be made and yes you may not feel good about it but that's what friends do. That's why they have the special place in your life.

There is one bond though that is stronger than friendship. It is called LOVE. When you love someone, you'll do anything. You will leave your best friends aside to think about that special someone and do stuff for him/her that you would never have thought yourself capable of doing. You are really lucky if the love of your life is your best friend too. I believe that there can't be anything like having your special someone as your best friend. A person who completely understands you and is there for you and who you know will care for you in more ways than one. You obviously would want to hang on to something so special, wouldn't you?

But lately i have been around a case where, although i have only a faint idea and probably a few wild guesses at best, i can't help feel that love is sometimes so overpowering that you lose the sense of right or wrong. I agree i'm working with peanuts here, but i can't help myself wondering if everything that's going on is correct? I know the person i'm talking about knows what i'm saying and why i'm saying it. I also know that i don't have the leverage to talk about sense in this situation as i don't know a lot, but it sure has helped me fully appreciate the meaning of words Love Is Blind and that love at times can be painful and cruel. It was this madness that love brings that i was talking about when i said that you'll do anything in the name of love.

I'm a bit tired, a bit wired and definitely impatient right now but there is nothing in my hands and all i can do is pray that everything works out for the best. I don't know though what that just might be. All i can say is that "Yaron, Dosti....badi hi haseen hai" so try and keep this alive........

What Do You Want From Me

Ahaa...another month passes by as we draw closer yet again to the end of a great year. Not for me but for a lot many others. US of A had its first black President, Congress won the elections in India, India lost to Pakistan in an ICC event, IIM barrier was breached, broken hand got mended, new and tantalizing friendships were formed (again not by me) and CAT went online. A lot of other things happened too which i don't have the time to talk about. Don't get me wrong this article is not about what all happened during the year and why it happened. I'm not going to chronicle all that. I'll leave that to the media people. Again I'm not here to define the sporting moment of the year or the political/economic moment of the year. This time in many months i know what i am going to write about. Now how is that for a start.

Again I would like to reassure you that this article is not about some melancholic cry for attention or to question the design of nature and the repercussions thereof. I guess we've had enough of that. But there is one thing i have not written about in a long time. Love, that sweet, innocent and spell bounding feeling. The current generation is intoxicated with this wonderful idea which according to Agent Smith is quite insipid. You see couples here, you see couples there. In the parks, on the phone, on instant messaging, they are everywhere. Typing messages in a frenzy, exchanging love notes and giggling that sweet laugh on that small, nonsensical joke they would have hated at other times. All in the name of love. To many it's the elixir of life. They can fight, argue with everyone around them, be it family, friends, colleagues but not with that special someone. At times i feel that the old adage 'Love is Blind' should be altered to 'Love is Retarded'.

Coming back to the topic, i would like to talk about love from a guy's perspective first and if possible from a girl's perspective (of what my crazy mind can throw up) later. A guy looking for some love, roaming around with his group of friends in the hot and spicy market place in Delhi like GK or Khan Market normally goes through the following process - Hey, that chick. Wow, she is awesome. Man i would want someone like her with me. Takes a look at who he is with, dips his head in disgust and moves on. Suddenly he notices somebody with the girl. He says - What the fuck, she is with that as****e. Man she can do so much better. Are eligible bachelors like me dead?? Feeling sorry for himself he finally trudges off the scene. That's what a typical guy does. That's how his love story progresses till he finally through chance, not providence meets somebody who seems interested in him.

It's a dream come true. The best thing that could ever happen in his sorry little existence. I am not so bad after all, he thinks smiling from ear to ear. Then it starts. The late night calls, the giggling, making lovey dovey statements, slight fighting, then degrading himself to say he is sorry although it wasn't his fault to begin with. Wishing for that one compliment of the week even though he might have showered 100's in a single day. Hiding the facts and figures from close friends - I'll tell them once something concrete happens. Trying his hardest to please the sacred one and trying his best not to get her mad with such devotion that would shame IIT/IIM aspirants. The one missed call and you leave everything you are doing to call back. The one message and India-Pakistan match goes for a toss. Soon all the happiness in life becomes tied to the whims of the oh so perfect soul. Allowing the buttons to be pushed at will and random, the same buttons they had defended so valiantly against everyone thus far.

But can there be trouble in paradise? Yes it can and it is a three letter word - JAF, short for Just A Friend. I never thought of you like that. You are my good friend, please don't put me through this. Or in the worst case, I already have a boy friend. I wanted to tell you but was not sure where we were in our friendship. Now that sucks and the all the magical world comes crashing down. Nickelback sang, Burn It To The Ground, and they sang well. Just a little too well for some. But that doesn't mean it's the end. No ways, after all he has waited for so long for this. He will fight and try and make the girl realize that love lies here and not elsewhere. But we all know how that story is going to end, don't we? It is this proverbial hope that keeps the lover boy going, doing things he never dreamed he would do. And thus the story goes on and on and on. Energizer could have a new theme for a campaign.

So that is how a guy typically falls in love and reacts. I know all of you reading this might have felt so for someone or the other if not yourself. After all it's a rarity that the girl actually falls for the guy when he proposes, except if she is in school. But then why do girls end up with the worst guy possible? Hard to say. As a friend of mine put it so beautifully once, 'Commonsense is not so common these days'. Then what is it that girls want? I wish i had the answer, i might be able to solve my problem. I do know a bit though about what girls don't want. They don't want to be questioned. They don't want to be center of a joke (they have every right to make a clown of you in public though). They don't want to be runners up in your life (even though you are JAF and you are never closer to the top of the ladder in their life). They can't be put on hold while you, well you know. But there are some things that the girls should be given credit for. And these are big things for which the guys actually fall in love in the first place. Girls can make your life special. Girls can make your day with sweet nothings. Girls can be very devotional and caring which simply blows your mind away.

Complicated matter is Love. Not easily defined. Not easily explained. Not easily felt. Very intoxicating. Very addictive and yes very very very much RETARDED................