Clarfication

Ever since i wrote my last article i have received a lot of suggestions and been part of a few discussions where i have been told that one can not stop loving in life. One incident should not allow you to change your attitude towards love. Whatever happens you should not give up on love etc. etc.....
I have thought about this and have come to the conclusion that whatever it was that i wanted to convey didn't get through to the people reading the article. Maybe if i rephrased it all it could be better understood. So I'm here today to offer an explanation as to what i really wanted to say when i wrote that article.
I agree i have been hurt badly in love. I stand here and say that we would be better off not being in love at all than to be hurt by the very persons we have loved so much. It simply means that i would today give anything to take away the pain and hurt that i have and still going through , to never remind of it again, much like it never happened. Also I have in no way changed my views on love as a feeling. I say that one day i might fall in love again and yes i look forward to that day but i would be a lot more cautious of the people and a bit more circumspect to avoid this kind of heartache.
I agree that all relationships cannot last a life time and there will be some pain/hurt even in the best of the relationships but that won't stop me from being cautious. So i guess now i might have answered few of the doubts raised that needed clarification........

What is Love..Baby don't hurt me..don't hurt me no more...

ishq waise hai ek aandhi ishq hai ek toofan....ishq ke aagey bebas hain duniyan mein har insaan...these are the words that make the day worthwhile for everyone. Every single being on this planet wants to love someone and be loved in return. Love is something one always craves for. Something you need in your life to make it feel complete. Surely your family as a support is there always, but they don't make the cut. They are there for the more mundane tasks, because when you are in love you have that heady feeling of aloofness when all else cease to matter. You want to spend all your time with your loved one. Breaking other engagements for that one date of say even an hour.

You might ask yourself what does this guy want writing about stuff we either know already about or don't want to know. Well to remove your doubt/misery i am here today to contest the very important phrase in human history that has been so often thrown around like a rag over the ages - ITS BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST THAN TO HAVE NEVER LOVED. First and foremost i want to meet the bloody person who said wrote this line in the first place.was he really crazy or did he not understand the real intricacies of love and was merely a bystander or did he not lose his love at all. I had always believed in this line and for so long that i could never think of it being untrue.But now at this point of time in my life i must admit my belief has been shaken.

Yes its true that there is nothing like love in this world.The aroma of love when it spreads gives you such a high that i don't think you'll need drugs anymore.The feeling inside you to hear that voice, see that face, that smile that laugh, it all can be very intoxicating.so much so you lose yourself in that sensation leaving behind everything you like and would not miss for anything else in the world.Love can change your life in ways more than you can ever imagine.But what happens when the one person you love and devoted your entire time on kicks you away like a football.having used you for their own purposes they now think they don' need you anymore in their lives because maybe they aren't sad anymore and don't need any shoulder to cry on. Or maybe it can be that they have found someone else to replace you in their lives. What happens then?

What should a person do in such a situation?Crestfallen from the hurt and pain that they are going through they stare as blind men into the sky or seek places of solitude to bury their pain.They don't understand why they are going through all this.What wrong have they done. All they did was love a certain someone with all their heart and thought that one day their efforts will be rewarded when the person concerned would acknowledge their role/presence in their lives.But that dream is not to be just like Alexander the Great fell short of conquering the world though many say he still did what no one else could repeat.But go and ask Alexander is he satisfied with that explanation?I bet you would not get a happy response.

So to come back to the point, i say that whoever said it was best to have loved and lost than to never have loved must never have lost his/her love.For as god as my witness i can stand here and say that i was better off never to have loved than to lose whatever i loved in a manner that i beg the lord to not inflict on anyone else.I cry for help from the almighty to explain to me why i was made to go through all this pain and why if i did indeed had to he didn't give me a strong heart to support it, to challenge it and in the end defeat it.This isn't a cry for sympathy as you might think but a resolve to strengthen myself against all further incidents. I don't say i will never love again, but i will surely be much more careful to give it away easily..........

In Pursuit of Happiness

Over the past couple of days i have thought about writing something on this page.....but whenever i open the link i somehow ween myself away from it.Its like i didnt want to write anymore.A tumultous month has left me literally in tatters....coming to terms with the bitter reality is taking time.All the factors put in a couldron stoked by the raging fire from hell...i feel that the angels of darkness are doin their everybit to keep me this way while the angels of light are busy somewhere vacationing.Maybe this is what the elders used to call the dark ages, it sure feels like that i can say.
Suddenly the promise of cheer is gone.No avenue from where a ray of hope or happiness might creep in.This condition has brought me to a point where i find myself trapped in a state of sorrow, no escape route visible.I feel like having been left here to live with the solitude that i have hated all my life and the state i have tried running away from all these years.Flashes of happiness spread across a galaxy of darkness has brought my vision to a standstill.The promisee of sun rising on the horizon has long been forgotten and the ever increasing darkness is trying to engulf whatever that remains in my mind of the once so happy place.
The struggle against this onslaught has been weak i must admit although i knew that it was coming. Letting it run over me like a sheep left alone in a pack of wolves. Thought not fully destroyed yet but i have to admit the flamboyant spirit has been dented. The once no care in this world attitude has suffered a big jolt and the perception has been altered. Gone are those days now and a much more sophisticated, a much more analysed approach will need to be taken to live with this darkness that surrounds me now.
But here i stop and wonder.Can it be?Can i let things be and try and move around them to avoid conflict/confrontation?Am i so fond of comfort that i'm not willing to fight for something that should be mine.My frredom, my light, my life, my love. So the bigger question now arises from the dust just like the rise of the Phoenix, Can i be such a coward to drop my arms before all and everything in this world?Is there a warrior spirit in me that says,"300 against 10,000 lets bring it."or the words of wisdom,"big chance of defeat small chance of success, what are we waiting for?"I believe that there is. A day will come when my spirit will break,my body will fail me,i will come to an end but this will not be this day.This day I fight.
The fire of passion will put to pieces the burning fire of hell stoking the couldron and i will emerge from this darkness of sadness surrounding me to be what i used to be and much more.But before all that is to happen i have to find a light to get to my bed....................

Donning the DON

Now when i first started writing my blog i couldnt find a good enough domain name with the travails of having a very very common name...(saurabh) so i had to rake my brains a lot...
then i hit upon this.....DONNING THE DON......Taken from my college nickname DON, so thought this would suit the domain name perfectly well...donning the mantle and living up to the name....or rather why is it that people call me that.
Any body who knows me (since college) has always asked me one thing when they meet me or come to know about me & the DON i.e. why i am called DON?well this credit goes to two of my very good frnds....Mr. Shijo K Joshua and Mr.Shailender Singh Negi(chota from hereon).A rather inconspicuous event and i had no idea that such a thing would become so big that hardly ne1 from college knows my real name now..and even in my office nobody (except for my seniors) call me by my real name.
So wat really happened?well i was in second year-the early days....oh the freshness of being some1's senior...the wish to rag the others the way we had been.....u knw wat im talkin abt....
we have all been thru that phase...well i was doin th same nthn etc..nd i wsnt alone...
i had a group of frnds wid me ragging a group of three....i don't think i went overboard i doubt tht seriously...but acording to chota and shijo, i did and they struck up wid the name and till date (5.5 yrs almost) i have been known by that name alone....hate it till date but hv learnt to live wid it....So now,there it is not a hilarious story but a Light Hearted one no doubt...a respite from my earlier write ups and the seriousness entailed....though i doubt this phase might not last for long.........newaz...abhi ke liye kafi hai....baad mein kuch aur likhenge

Butchers,Barbarians,Robbers-The story of Nehru/Gandhi Dynasty

Well the events of past week have certainly given my thoughts a new dimension.Till now i was oblivious to the truth,to what has happened but now after having learnt it all i must say im sick,sick of wat these ppl have done and are doin to this lovely country of ours.They have EXISTED for more than 100 years.

But during this time they have used all their strength to ruin this country of ours.The extended British Rule,they didnt want the british to leave(asking for dominion status).Had it not been for Bhagat Singh's call for full Independence we might not have seen the light of day for the next 15-20 yrs.After that the partition,the strife caused which is haunting us to this day.The greed for power by the Clan/dynasty in Indian Politics has brought one of the biggest mistakes committed in the world.

The over zealous mother who needed all the power all the time and couldn't let her own son take the limelight,result son murdered.The slow reaction to every terror strike,every infiltration bid,hell they even let a former PM assassinated,one of their own family just like his brother.What do we hear now that the very conspirator and the accused has been granted Life term from Death Sentence on a mercy petition filed by none other than the man's wife.What have they not done to stay in power.They have killed their own kin let alone the others they killed to ensure their success.

I ask you today what has Congress in its 123 yrs of existence ever done for India except ruin the nation once so glorious and made it to be ranked amongst the lowly of nations in the world.The sheen,splendour gone.Looted away by none other than the Nehru-Gandhi dynasty that has ruled India for a Century now(almost).They are the perfect allies for everry terror outfit in the world and god knows when the innocent people of this country will wake up and see what these bloody butchers have done to them,their fellow country men and to this nation, once called the THE GOLDEN BIRD.

Is There Any Good Left

As days go by i feel myself moving away from things i have cherished for so long.Growing up is tough and seeing things around you change has a dramatic effect on you.It can totally change you or your outlook towards life.World as wee know it today has changed a lot from say a decade ago and it will continue to change in the coming years.But at israpid change i'm feeling lost and wondering what is actually going on.People are not what they used to be.No more friendliness(let alone friends),no more senstivity.It saddens me that we humans as a race are treading on a path which will only result in pain,suffering,bitterness,hatred and the likes.
Today when i see around and listen/read news all i can hear about is Assault, Robbery, Rape, Murder, Bribery etc..What is this?I know that these have existed in the human society for centuries if not ages but what depresses me the most is the increased no. of such incidents that we come across in our daily lives today and added to that is the age of the culprits & the victims involved.It seems like the "Young Generation" of today (I'm involved too, I know) has stopped caring about the results of their actions.I somehow feel they don't know why they are doing this even.There is just some unseen hand guiding them through these events like the angels of Hell working their magic to lead this race to a premature end.
There is so much vileness today that I have begun to wonder that is ther any thing good left in this world?Is there anywhere on this planet something good that we can look forward to, to change our lives,make the situation better?I believe there is.I think there is something that the world can hang on to, that there is still some good left in these dark times and will continue to be there but only getting tougher and tougher to find.Now i don't say do this or do that or you are doing wrong or right.All i am saying is that whatever it is that you are planning to do or the action you are planning to take, think about it and see whether you would like to see something similar done to you or your family.If the answer to that question is Yes then my friends there is nothing on this earth that should stop you from doing it but if its a No then you needn't look beyond yourself for restrain.
So with this thought in mind I'm signing off today with many things left unsaid but yet i hope undertood...............tc & God Bless Us All

What Women Want

Another oft repeated topic but kya karein dil hai ki maanta nahin.well i know everyone must surely have an opinion on this topic but wat's the harm if i just went ahead and expressed my own.To begin with we have had countless mails circulated where people have made fun of wat actually goes through a women's mind,we have had our share of laughs on reading the jokes.there is the other nerdy group too which has spent most of its life trying to figure out the intricacies of women psychology coming out with new findings and results every fortnight or so.But to be rally sure whether those can be generalised to all the women in the world is somewhat far fetched.
people say that women are the more sensitive of human beings.They are more emotional.But what i would like to ask these people is that do not men show emotions.Don't they care for their loved ones or for others even for that matter.Fact is we are better able to control our emotions which gives rise to the fib that men are less emotional than women.Now i know what i write here might not sound pleasing to a lot of peope but then again i can't do anything about it.I'm not here to please everyone.Though your comments are always welcome.Coming back to topic i would like to remind all the guys out there who have in any capacity cared for a girl in their lives.How is it that their one smile/laugh/grimace can change our entire mood and we become so helpless and actually enjoy being in that state.
This is the control women have over us.Their one request could mean everything for us.It's not to say that we don't enjoy doing it.We love it to the core but what i want to highlight is the fact that we are so enchanted by their stance that there is nothing we can do.We act as slaves in their company doing their bidding though they don't mean it at all.Women have for a long time if not from the start had their way with men.They are the supreme manipulators.They can do whatever they want whenever they want to us and we'll be glad still.That's just the beauty of it.You wish to have control over others so you go bully people to show your strength or intimidate others to get what you want.Women don't need all that.
Women for their part are a confused lot.This i think everyone will agree with me on(atleast i think so).They are never really sure what they actually want themselves.Some do and they are very good at it too but the concept can not be generalised.Women actually try to run so many things in their mind at a given point that they end up being confused about the real thing at hand.This sometimes helps them in getting labeled as "dumbo",though they can't do anything about it.They just act this way because they expect us men to understand what they want to say automatically.I mean whatever is running through their minds,whatever is it that they want us to tell, they somehow feel that we should be knowing that already.We needn't be told about it by them.
This is a very surprising line of thought.How can we know what is running through their minds yaar.If we knew i wouldn't be sitting and writing this stuff right now.But wat can we do this is wat is expected of us.This is why it becomes so difficult to talk to women sometimes.What they don't understand is that we guys generally don't like to fret about stuff we have no idea of.We prefer being told things rather than being given subtle hints which are so difficult to understand.This is why you see so many couples breaking up today.Frankly speaking two guys can become frnds based on almost nothing.Two guys can be friends just because they are guys.They don't need anything to start a conversation and sports is always there to talk about.But its not the same with girls.There you need to find the right words,right phrases and right timing otherwise forget friendship.
Studies have shown that men on an average think about sex once every 10 seconds.That is true to a lot of extent.We don't have a lot of things going around in our minds.And frankly i can say i'm happy about it too because why do we need to think about other stuff which has got nothing to do with us right now.I for one love to live in the present.But things are not always what we would have liked them to be so people end up thinking about other stuff too.Which is fine as not everyone can be the same.
Well having written all this i am beginning to confuse myself too.Women are so confusing that even thinking or writing about them can confuse you.So before any of this goes in any other direction i wanted it to be i'll end it here and maybe come back later when im fresh of ideas.
So in the end all i would say is if you really love someone and you want to make that girl happy all you gotta do is spend time with her.Try to understand her feelings.Guess her mood by her expressions cause she won't tell you but she will be hurting inside no doubt.I guess i have made an effort at establishing the concept of women psychology though it aint even the beginning of it but that's all for now.......................................

Piece Of Mind

Although i have written on the lines of this topic before but you guys can take it as a continuation if you like.Well to begin with no matter what you achieve.what you buy,what you get yourself you can never be satisfied.Its not in human nature to be.They are always looking for more.Searching for more riches to somehow make them feel better,Somehow make them feel happy.But all the riches in this world can not buy real happiness.You continue your search for happiness everywhere you go in everything you do.But you never know if you're truly happy because what is happiness can never be fully defined.It's very subjective and indeterminable o say the least.You'll always be looking out for something.
But If you for a moment stop and say No I have had enough.I am happy as i am right now.I have found everything i ever wanted and everything i was looking for then what would happen to you.I personally believe that you would cease to exist.You no longer would belong to this world.You can in many ways become one with the supreme one.You leave all the riches here,everything you have ever gained to gain the biggest prize of them all.But we don't want that do we?We want to live in this world as it is here we have always belonged.Who has seen heaven?Nobody alive i can say.We live all our life in this materialistic world and here is where we die.So why should we want the riches of some other world.
Answer is very simple if you believe me.It's simply because nobody living in this world is happy with his or her existence.They are looking for ways to get out of the mess they are in.And only the riches of that other world supposedly can provide them with the exit.That's the view generally held by many.I for a change am a part of the crowd here.I agree with this point of view because for me its only in the holy aode can you really be content for once and for all in your everlasting life.No more running,no more hunting.This is the ultimate peace you can get and the only thing worth living for,worth dying for:)

What I've Done

People are strange when you're a stranger Faces look ugly when you're alone
Women seem wicked when you're unwanted streets are uneven when you're down
When you're strange faces come out of the rain when you're srange........................so sang Jim.......
But that is something very true...very very true. Whatever you think of them thy can surprise you at every moment. The expectations thy have of you.the expectations you have of them
Its hard to make every1 arnd u happy no matter wat you do you somehow somewhere put yourself infront and let go of others. This hurts people although you never intended to.
People are strange...they make views very quickly on different topics.What you said what you meant. what you didnt mean and the related stuff.they don't give u a chance to explain urself,forming their opinions and sticking to them no matter what.
I find this aspect very disturbing because for me everyone i care abt should always have a good opinion of me.If by any chance i have left them down then i try my best to let them know whether it was a fault of mine or not and even if it was, why it happened.But like life ppl dnt give u a second chance.for them what's once done is done no turning back.But im nt like tht.I give people chance to say they are sorry and accept their explanations as to why things happened.I am always willing to lend an ear,something i'm always short of when it is my turn.
Expectations.....what does this word mean?what does it include?its always hard to live up to other's expectations is wat every1 says.but is tht really true or is it tht we promise so much to others tht thy strt thnkn more and more of us nd as a consequence thy want us to deliver more everytime?Friendship is one relationship where every1 says tht all u shd ever do is give nvr expect nethng in return..But how cn tht be are we not humans?do we ourselves don't want nethng for ourselves?I believe whoever said tht must have gotten a lot............
Life is beautiful...........people spend time worrying about stuff tht doesn't really matter actually.I know i do it all the time.I tend to live in the past whereas LIFE is now...I keep on telling myself not to sweat the small stuff but still i do.its when heart runs over mind tht such decisions are taken.This is why we feel th pain and hurt when something goes wrong because we are nevr detached frm th worldly possessions.From emotions,greed,want..............But then again if all this goes missing from our lives then wat kind of life would we be living?A dull monotonous life where everyday we would want death to come and take us away.Is that normal?that is a sadistic thought but sadly many of us feel like this a lot of time.
Finally...............the question now arises that is there a cure for all this?Can human suffering be controlled?Can emotions,need and want really exist and still not make us miserable?Can we strike the right balance?If so do we need someone with us to strike that balance or can we handle it on our own?These are some of the many thoughts that crossed my mind today which i have written here and hope to get some answers to.Who answers them for me is still a mystery............................


P.S. - Thoughts might not have been articulated properly so for further clarifications don't contact me.

A Look Back

Ok its been around a two month break since i last wrote on Christmas. A lot has happened since then in my life. Saw many results come out..for the exams i was preparin.....
A lot of studyin and practise ensued....hardwork is needed.Man i did study i can say that much. But the fact remains was that enough, coz others too would have studied..nt me alone......Wat is it that makes MBA exams so popular and the hysteria around them.People are today mad about doin MBA.It doesn't matter from where they do it.They have to do it.This is how people feel.
Here i atleast think something is missing.So much stress on good management skills has been put that people today don't regard the other skills with same dignity. I mean u cn still be a leader and a team player even if ur nt a manager.But somehow the degree seems to emphasise the opposite.Even the corporates are not willing to give candidates a chance if they are not from a B-school let alone a good B-school.This social structure is putting undue stress on people today.Mnagement today is looked upon as a necessity rather than a want or need.
Why has this developed is not difficult to understand but i won't talk about that.It's disturbing engh tht this exists.Can we imagine wat is this rat race leading to.people are working hard getting higher degrees,working late,stayin away from family,earnong big bucks,splurging them on materialistic things.Things which are ephemeral in their value.Consequently, they get bored with them soon.Big pay packets have given rise to high degree of consumerism.what has this resulted in?Envy among peers/neighbours for sure.I doubt that many are satisfied with the kind of life they are living.Running around here and there.Taking orders from ppl thy dnt respect.Submitting themselves to greed.
why is it so has any one ever stopped to think and consider.If you take a survey the answer would most probably come out a big no.People are too busy to think where their life is headed and why their doin wat thy r doin.Is this wat thy want and if so thn y? just because somebody else has it or is this ur aim in life.if people stop for a while take some rest and take a look back at their lives thy would surely not be very happy.The missed b'day of their loved one.The first steps of ur kid.Ur parents anniversary.Somethings money can't buy says the MasterCard,that definitely includes Time,Love among others.But i would like to focus on time at this point.
Time is the biggest reality.It has brought down the biggest of empires through out history.No one has stood and defeated time.So why do ppl today thnk thy can.Death will come no matter how much advances science can make.So y the fighting and running around.You came alone to this world,and you will go alone.You wont take away nethn.no money,clothes,memories,love..nthn
everything is so superficial yet it is this wat we demand.what we crave for.this is wat has taken away our peace of mind.But its high time ppl do smthn abt it.This life is nt to be wsted.Appreciate it.start by appreciating nature.Ur fellow humans,animals.Find beauty where u cn and learn to appreciate.Take ur mind off grievances instead learn to be happy in small things.That makes a hell of a differnce.develop love in ur dealings.Try to be more happy thn sad.take out time fr urself.think about stuff.let ur mind relax.
Its high time we took a step back and gave A LOOK BACK.

Just a Little Unwell

Well i know that this is not an original scrip but i can't help it this song is so close to my heart and aptly describes my life so far with very few moments outside the purview of the lyrics here...so here it is UNWELL by MatchBox 20

All day, Staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night, Hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something
Hold on, I'm feeling like
I'm headed for aBreakdown, I don't know why
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know, right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be
Me

Talking to myself in public
Dodging glances on the train
I know, I know they've all been talking 'bout me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong
With me, Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow, I've lost my mind
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

I been talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they'll come to get me
Yeah, they're taking me away
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy I'm just a little impaired
I know, right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be
Hey, how I used to be
How I used to be, yeah
Well I'm just a little unwell
How I used to be
How I used to be

Where am i headed

I am a dreamer.Always have been.Starting right from my school years when i dreamt of making it big.I have to admit i dreamed of being famous in school.But never got around to being one.Consoling myself that things would change once i enter college.After all 'HUM HUM HAIN BAKI SAB PAANI KAM HAI'.So passed away the final year of school.
Come college and i was all excited about being truly independent about doing what i wanted to do thru the day rather than sit in a room doing what others wanted me to do.But reality struck the situation wasn't much different.With the result oriented Educational Field in the country how can one expect to sit back and let others run ahead.So came the rat race.attending all classes and running here n thr for the notes.My dream of being famous took many turns and changes first was performing in cultural events which i turned down on my account.You can say i was sy but i wd term it more as a fear of being laughed at.
I admit it thr ws this insecurity tht hass stopped me time n again frm showing my talents/even participating (ok).....but then i though tht if i really want to be famous thn i must get to knw a lot of seniors and tht requires work so i set out tryin my hand at volunteering for Fests n all.
But that too didnt materialise over the next 2 yrs.
Slowly my dream faded away and i accepted the reality tht i wsn't to be the one who every1 knew.I like many others was just anthr guy.Nothin special in me to showoff as it is.my focussed shifted from college to the next level i knew tht i wd have to do wll in job/MBA to get noticed nd took heart in tht.
But let me state here for the record that all my life everything i have done has been for a purpose not for the heck of it.I do things only if thy give me something back in return otherwise not.Call it selfishness but i say its th truth with every1 doing the same thing.im nt ashamed of it.
This is not to say that i dnt help out people.I do as much as i can but it has a hidden reason behind it.I like the good feeling you get when you help people.I like it how i feel having hekped some1 out.
coming back to subject at hand colg got over job began but again i missed out but i guess i cdnt help it thr isnt much to do here to really call urself famous.So i dnt care..But i have a dream tht was structured when i read a line that has been in my head ever since.what i do in life is inconsequential as long as whatever i do makes a difference to even 1 person and when i die i can go peacefully knowing that people would remmember me saying how gr8 a guy he was and not just the ones i knw but also th ones i dnt knw.thts what shd be th true purpose of one's life.I want to leave behind a legacy where people look up to me for anythng they want........................................................................................................................

My Blog

Well to tell the truth here you will find a lot of things about me, me and me only.Simply because i love to talk and especially about myself.so if you don't wanna read it then i'm sorry i can't help it.But i have to be honest here from the outset i have been totally against the idea of blogging terming it as a waste of time and a useless activity.I have always told people what i think of them to their face and not worried about what they might think of me, as a result i have lost quite a few frnds over the years sm pretty close at tht too.I always thought that if someone was close to me he/she'll understand what i want to say and really know that in all earnest i mean the best for them.But sadly people are not like that.they need to be told only positive things about them i.e. all thy need is someone to make them happy.
No one needs a Devil's Advocate just coz' they can't handle the truth and sadly here is where i come in picture as i am the perfect candidate for the post.so as i result i found myself having lot more fights with frnds thn earlier and hence started keeping my thoughts to myself and not letting people know what i want to say.As a result of which i found myself getting frustrated at small thngs and hitting out at th wrng people at th wrng time.
Tht's when i realised i needed an outlet for my thoughts i need to tell people wat i feel and tht's when the idea of blogging struck me.i have to admit this is personal stuff and today people don't give a damn about it but i need an outlet for my thoughts so i don't care wat thy thnk.So this was how i got around to starting a Blog of my own.Stay tuned for more.........................

The Early Years

I always had an inclination for writing but never got around to writing nethn tht cd be termed as an effort.first big effort was in Xth class when i wrote a slew of "sher" is wat u'll call them as in "sher - o - shaiyari" ones.it was an effort no doubt nd wat wid the comments i had to handle at the end of it all from everyone around.That's when i decided to give up writin 'em.
But the writer in me refuseed to die.My closest frnd shifted to Chennai when i entered XIth.So began the era of snail mail a hearty exchange of letters between us stretching over 2 yrs.Boy it seems so long back taking it was not the time of E-mails yet.That was a time when i used to write about almost everythng happening in my life.
But tht chngd with e-mails nd all nd we gt anthr mode to communicate.but colg life made me a bit lazy nd the my mind weaned off a bit of writing.But all tht changed in Feb 2004 when due to a very important reason i decided to reinvigorate my writer abilities and started a new phase which continues till date.I began writing poems.Although i won't term as extraordinary or nethng.I am quite humble u c so i cn say thy are at best amateurish with no use of hi-fi words n all just plain simple english and rhyming sentences.
So i can say i'm a writer at heart but the output maynot be too exceptional(sadly).
This was the background of my writing career in short..he he ok i knw it was a pj but still felt good..he he..................