Why Bournemouth will stay up

Much has been written before the start of the season & even after Round3 of the Barclays Premier League on where Bournemouth will end up come May 2016. The verdict by all noted pundits has been a fall back to the championship for Eddie Howe’s side. There is no denying that the Cherries will find it tough in their first season in top flight but what Bournemouth have going in their favour is their young and enterprising manager.

Eddie Howe seems like a brave manager who is not unwilling to change & the little that his side has shown during the 3 games so far is their tendency to continue to push the opposition. In only their second game of the season against a much fancied Liverpool side, a wrongly awarded goal from Liverpool’s 32.5 million pound centre forward Christian Benteke was the only difference between the two sides. That, they could restrict the movement of Liverpool’s playmaker Coutinho to work his magic near the box was a testament to the defensive shape Howe’s players can keep under pressure while frustrating the opposition.

The next game saw them take on West Ham at Upton Park where the Cherries twice took a 2 goal lead, only to let slip the advantage and allow the hammers back into the game. The defensive frailties on display from both the teams made for nerve wrecking football. Although they bagged their first points of the campaign, Howe would not have been too happy to see the mistakes committed by his team & it but shows that they have a long way to go to ensure their survival in one of the toughest league in Europe. Howe though must be pleased to see his team playing well while going forward and trying to breakdown defences no matter who the opposition is. Where they will end up finally only time will tell but if Howe can keep on motivating his team to play this attacking football, they will surely find themselves in top flight next season.

Four changes Brendan Rodgers needs to make to salvage Liverpool’s season

Much has been said of the sale of Suarez & absence of Daniel Sturridge to injury on the recent woes of Liverpool on the football pitch. No doubt these two were the biggest influence on Liverpool’s stunning run last season when they came closest to winning the title in 24 years. The money from Suarez’s sale to Barcelona for 75 million pounds was used to add depth to the squad that the team so badly needed with a definite eye on future for the football club. However, things have not gone as per plan as Brendan Rodgers agreed in the post-match interview after seeing his side suffer a 5^th straight defeat in all competitions at the hands of Crystal Palace at Selhurst Park. There is an urgent need for change & it begins with Rodgers having to bite the proverbial bullet & take some hard decisions.

Change #1: Drop Gerrard to the bench

To the Liverpool faithful this statement is tantamount to blasphemy. Who would have imagined this day when people start doubting the influence “Captain Fantastic” has on a game. But, at 34, Gerrard is way past his prime. Nobody can ever question his commitment for the club with whom he has been synonymous for during the last decade and a half. Liverpool is Gerrard & Gerrard is Liverpool as many fans have grown up seeing, believing & chanting. But the time to hand over the baton has come. It’s also time for Rodgers to realize that Gerrard probably has to play fewer games and be used more as an impact sub rather than midfield star he has been throughout his life. And if history tells us anything, it’s how great players continue to deliver for their clubs even while going into sunset. Frank Lampard, Zinedine Zidane, Carlos Puyol are such examples of great players who have continued to achieve success even after not playing regularly for their teams. It’s a tough ask of both the captain & the coach but it needs to be done. The replacement(s) with the likes of Jordan Henderson or Joe Allen who have been Gerrard’s understudy for two years now must take up the role that he has played so exquisitely & stand up & be counted as men.

Change #2: Deploy two strikers upfront

Yes Suarez & Sturridge are brilliant players but going back to last season it was the famous “SAS” that was the talk of the media circles before & after every match Liverpool played. A lethal strike partnership that destroyed defenses at will. Why Rodgers prefers to play Balotelli as the lone forward in the absence of Sturridge is beyond comprehension. Balotelli is a much better player when he has a strike partner who he can feed off from, who can create the odd knock down for him or set him up to score with a tap in. Asking the same of Sterling, Coutinho or even a returning Lallana is too much burden for players who generally are more useful when the defense is busy attending to the central strikers upfront. With Sturridge out injured till January, it leaves the club to play 11 more games till his return in a period which will pretty much define Liverpool’s season. Rodgers must change his outlook & put out a team that can get the best out of the player he spent 16 million pounds on.

Change #3: Drop Dejan Lovren & shift to 3 player defense

Lovren signed from Southampton in the summer is yet to prove why Rodgers forked out 20 million pounds for him. After 15-16 starts questions have to be asked why Rodgers is persisting with a defender who is making boys look like men in front of him. In contrast the new defensive setup of Southampton after departures of Lovren, Luke Shaw (to ManU) has been one of the stingiest in the league with more than half a dozen clean sheets in the 12 games played so far. Many would agree that letting go of Agger was a mistake, injuries to Sakho & Flannagan have not helped Rodger’s cause either. But why a club which thrives on giving opportunities to players from its academy, a point well branded in Rodger’s philosophy too is not doing so in the much criticized defensive setup is bewildering (Liverpool shipped 51 goals last season, 3^rd highest in the league & have already let in 21 in 12 games so far of the current season). Lovren has clearly not settled well in the team & it is time Rodgers took a chance with a different set up. Even Man Utd with all the injuries were able to scrap a win against the attacking prowess of Arsenal with 3 central defenders (two of whom are 17 year old academy players).

The new setup would mean Rodgers would have to move away from his preferred 4-3-3 formation which has brought him so much success to a new 3-5-2 by using Lallana & Sterling as wide players supported by Johnson/Moreno & Manquillo as the overlapping fullbacks. It’s time to fit the formation to suit his players rather than fit the players to suit his formation.

Change #4: Change the scouting team

History suggests that Liverpool have never been good at buying the right players for the team, names of Andy Carroll, Stewart Downing, Alberto Aquilani among many more remind the club’s fans of how the money was wasted on securing the services of players who were yet to prove themselves at the highest level. These three alone cost Liverpool around 75 million pounds with little or no returns.

Names of players like, Fernando Torres, Dirk Kuyt, Luis Suarez, Xavier Mascherano stick out of having come in & made a huge impact on the club but, these guys were already match winners before they came to Liverpool. Same can’t be said of somebody like Carroll who was in his first full season in the premier league and yet to establish himself as a prolific striker before he was snapped up by Kenny Dalglish for a then record fee for a British player for 35 million pounds.

What Liverpool need is a change of scouts to find the right guys who can fit into the club’s philosophy. Granted it is easier to work with great players who can blend easily into any setup but they come at a price and Liverpool have not had access to such resources for a long time. So the next best thing is to find players whom the manager can mould into his own. With the upcoming January window, the target must be to find the right players not just any player to fill the Suarez void.

Liverpool need to ring in the changes if they have to salvage their season. Title is long gone and the only hope they have worth fighting for is a top four finish which is getting increasingly difficult with the likes of Swansea City & Southampton biting at the heels of the proverbial big four. Maybe the changes bring the effect that the club’s supporters want to see and maybe the rub of the green which has eluded Liverpool this season might come back to bring a cheer to the fans in the New Year.

My Club, My Story

Having gotten a cable TV connection last month only, it was sheer luck that I stumbled upon a channel showing a football match at near midnight. It was nearing half time & the score read Milan 3-0 Liv. I felt the game was pretty much over but seeing a live game after so long made me linger on. Honestly, I hadn’t heard of LFC back then & was kind of rooting for Milan to win. Then came the turn around that the world never expected, led by a young captain-Steven Gerrard. The first strike at the turn of the hour was magnificent & the next 30 minutes brought two more memorable goals & the rest as they is history. That was a magical night, if there ever has been one in footballing history. It was that game, that second half that made me a fan of the player, the captain, the legend. It was not just the footballing brilliance on the field that struck me. There have been & will be better players than Gerrard to have stepped on to the grass, likes of Maldini, Figo, Torres etc. have been known to produce magic on the field. But, it was the dedication, the ability to motivate the team & above all lead by example that has kept me captivated ever since with continuous repeat performances at all stages.

Naturally, that’s when my love affair with the club started. The overwhelming & sparkling history, an unparalleled success story & of course the associated bragging rights is what Liverpool brings to the table. The club’s history is seeped with great success & greater players. I know that every major club around the world boasts of this. But these great clubs don’t have what LFC has – ‘The Fans’. A patient lot who back their club no matter what, rejoice in its success & give deserved respect to other clubs fans’ & players. The support, the loyalty & the undying devotion even in adversity & crisis to see the club reach the zenith of success it once held so admirably. It is this attitude that makes watching matches at Anfield such a memorable experience & reminds me time & again of how complete I feel as a person when I’m in touch with the club, even though I’m sitting thousands of miles away in a hotel room in India. They are the reason I’m & will always be a LFC fan.

The Inevitable Wait

It’s that time of the year again when the colors come out, flags hanging outside homes & excitement & joy go hand in hand with the little kids as they move to fill the stadium of the clubs they love & support. Yes it is the beginning of the football season that captivates the whole nation, continent & perhaps the world, going by the popularity that these clubs have in countries as far away as Australia or Singapore. It is no denying the football is a global phenomenon & who it is to contest this fact when you see a Cristiano Ronaldo or a Robin Van Persie in each living room or out on the back of kids playing in the summer heat on the streets. It’s just not the home crowd that goes ga-ga come the month of August; it’s the same in many parts of the world as after an almost 3 month break, the heroes return on their field of exploits to enthrall the living.

Being a football fan for a long part of my life, I feel the sadness when in May the season draws to a close. There will be no more matches every week. No more going over the footage. No bickering over the tackles or the foul that was not given. In short the happiness if only momentarily, is lost. Then the wait begins. Wait for the dreaded summer to pass. As George RR Martin’s spellbinding saga, Game of Thrones comments, “The Winter is coming”, for football fans across Europe it couldn't come sooner. Three months is a long time for a football fan who is ready to live & die by his club, so is his dedication, love & support for the club, the players, the history. It is a pain to not turn to the noise coming from the stadiums as a goal is scored filling millions of hearts with joy & pain at the same time.

The close season though does offer the thrill of the anticipation of the movements in the transfer market. The chance for the clubs to get the players that would help them win all that they want to win & more in the coming season. It is also a chance to let go of the players you felt were undeserving of donning the same colors you wear. Rest assured, every fan has his views on the transfer policy of the club & who they should get in to bolster the squad & whom to let go to balance the books. Believe me the gossips floating around in media circles are far juicier than the news. As time passes, summer gives way to autumn & as the last grand slam of the year in US Open at the Flushing Meadows gets underway, so does the footballing season across Europe.  No need to tell that battle lines have already been drawn, to do one-upmanship on the nearest rivals, to shut up ‘The Noisy Neighbors’.

Every season starts with hope & pride filling up the hearts of the fans that are either smitten from last season’s successes or are looking to improve from the disappointments. It is a breath taking moment when time stops at kick-off time for the first game of the new season. The thrill is back. The nail biting finishes. Looking at the clock anxiously, yelling at the players, cursing the referee all to see your team get the morale boosting win under their belt. And within the first few weeks, predictions are drawn on where the clubs will lie come the end of the campaign.

Football is a game that brings people together. People from all walks of life, from different countries coming together to raise their voice in support of the colors they love to adorn on their backs, all the while filled with pride. Yes, all of this sounds a bit fanatical but to a true fan, this is his life. This is what he lives for in true sense of the word. It’s a passion that defines many lives; kids growing up supporting & loving their heroes, The Beckhams, Messis and countless others. You will do all the fighting, brawling, defending that is needed in the name & honor of crest you wear on your chest when you step out on the street, making your way to the stadium to join in the noise.

Change - Lost in Transition

Two months have passed since the incident that shook the nation. No judgement has been passed & the prime accused are looking at bail & possibly smaller terms due to botched up investigation & general apathy. Meanwhile, a terror strike in southern part of nation kills more than 20 people & injuring more than 100 people. The home minister shuns responsibility while other political parties bray for his blood. The nation needs a strong budget to reduce uncertainty  push reforms, address economic situation & with an eye on general election, the govt. is mulling a populist budget to suit its purpose. To hell with Fiscal Deficit, who cares about it anyways. We have & will continue to make money through countless scams (big or small). This is the mind frame of all the dacoits (as per Paan Singh Tomar) sitting the Indian Parliament. Those who have power are minting money & those who crave power want to mint money. Nobody is bothered where this country is heading and what their responsibilities are.
I wrote in my last piece how we should stand up, raise our voices against the govt. apathy & fight for what is our right - safety & end to corruption.I also made a point to let's not allow the circumstances we are witnessing to die & be forgotten in our daily lives. But after just two months, not only are we lost back in our cocoon styled lives but also have forgotten about everything that transpired. We desire sympathy/empathy from the govt. or the political parties wooing us for their votes but sometimes I wonder whether we deserve any of that or do we truly deserve their apathy as we can see day in & day out. In sports, it's a common saying that a captain is only as good as his/her team. It seems so apt looking at us today. Joker (The Dark Knight) said of Gotham, "This city needs a better class of criminals." I had for long felt that this nation needs a better class of politicians but I am not so sure of it anymore. We have the politicians we don't need right now but they are what we deserve.
I might sound all gloomy, disappointed & to some I might be just cribbing & fretting over nothing as I can't appreciate stuff (their words not mine) but to tell the truth I can't seem to get over the hurt when I look & can't find a clean politician or when I so wish I don't read about a new rape case in some part of the country & I see two cases on the news. I know, I am prone to preaching which people detest more than the hair growing out of their noses or ears but I can't help myself. In spite of the negativity surrounding me I am sadly still holding out for hope that one day this nation awakes & yells at top of its voice that ENOUGH!! I have not yet lost faith in the system which currently pampers to divide & rule & I often make myself believe that there is always HOPE & it is this feeling that provides some purpose to me in my daily existence. A question that springs to mind on going through this turmoil is, "Is there anything I can do?" But the coward in me sites the case of the problem being TOO BIG for a small ME & that one man can't change the system philosophy to make me sit back down & try & paper over the cracks of my moral fiber.
But change is needed & we need a leader who can be selfless enough to take up that task for us. Cause it won't be easy & it would require lot of sacrifices along the way. We need a Dark Knight, who can not be a silent guardian....

Change

Its ok to grief. Its ok to feel sad. Its ok to cry a little too. A nation you love so much has been let down by its public and its politicians so why shouldn't one cry out in disgust at the apathy of the rulers of this great nation? Why do we let ourselves be taken for a ride by the herd of money minting goons who have no care for us? Why don't we learn? Is it human to commit same mistake again & again? Why don't we focus on educating the public? Why are we mute spectators in this era of crime? Why is the sense of self comes first more important than of building a nation?
People say that a change is in order. The public wants answers. They need reassurances. But don't they need a sharper memory too to remind those in power that their time of sitting idle and doing nothing is over.
Its a black day in the timeline of existence of this country. Do we make noise or make our voices heard? Do we do anything but crib, deride, curse and forget? Do we let this victimization stand or do we stand up against the apathy and make this incident count? A day will come when we will fail as a race but can we let it be today? Should we not show our strength and let the braveheart know that her death spurred a nation from slumber into action? Lets rise! above the hate, above the displeasure, above the anger to ensure that this is not lost in memory, or in politicos dramas, or in media sensationalism.

An angry & sad individual who is coward enough to hide behind cynicism.

Epilogue

Another chapter in my life draws to a close as i prepare to spend the last of my days in this MBA institute. Have been through a lot of different circumstances, experienced gloom, sadness, happiness and complete ecstasy. I have never been fond of studying and i felt the pain again after 4 years of working when i had to prepare for all the exams, quizzes and presentations. To top it all, having to stay awake in classes was a big problem. I still remember being caught sleeping 4 times by the same prof in the first term itself. No wonder i was nicknamed SOTI.... :) (though it came about on the rural immersion trip). I knew staying awake would be a problem but i guess i crossed all limits during these two years :)

Before coming to Indore, I had heard a great deal from different people about the quality of food and different delicacies you can find here. I was excited no doubt but I was hugely disappointed as apart from a few places rest had nothing special about them. Don't know if i could call a particular dish made better in this town than anywhere else but yes i can get almost everything available here in every other place. Moreover, mess food as expected  was useless and I spent almost 3 days a week eating outside. All the time going to only one place near the institute whose every dish includes cheese and sometimes only cheese. Result: Zero bank balance but inflated tummy till the point it started looking shameful :(((

My life here has revolved around a lot of TV series and movies. The fact that there aren't any places to hang out in this town (refraining from calling it a city) has only helped in the despair that surrounds whenever the point of 'going out' is discussed. There is nothing you can do in your free time and this sense of wastefulness really gets to you day by day. Although we do have a 3 month old sports complex operational in the campus, i have never gotten around to make full use of it and i accept that it is inertia on my part that is responsible. Still it counts for little when all you can do is go to a mall, roam around (as u can't shop with zero bank balance) and come back.

One thing i have done in these two years is learn more about human behavior. I have gotten to know a lot more about how people are/can be. I have always known that no one is your own and there are some motives attached always but coming face to face with some has not been a pleasant experience. All my life i have found a couple of friends that i could call my own-those i can count on no matter what and those who know what I'm going through by just reading my words. Sadly, though I've failed to find those here. I mean yes they are good friends but not all weather friends. Those who know me also know that i don't get angry or sad easily when it comes to people around me but if i look at myself today, I'm not so sure. There seems a pain inside me that refuses to go away no matter what i do. I hate being like this but i guess i feel a sense of betrayal that i have not experienced ever and this is what is probably hurting the most. People told me how these two years would be the most exciting years of my life and yes i know couple of you reading this would call me the cribber (like always) but i would definitely not agree that these were the best years of my life. 

Without getting into specifics i would say that i was a sort of a misfit for this program. Many times i thought about why i am here and what i can accomplish. These self-doubts exist even today but i guess they've quietened down since last week. To be honest, I ain't actually proud of anything i did in the two years i have spent here. Looking back, i see how different things could have been and yes given a chance I would love to go back and change a couple of them. Maybe then i wouldn't feel the way I'm feeling right now......

Casting Out The Demons!!

Looking back at all the things i have written from my shaiyari to my poems and now to my articles, i have come to realize one thing - I am a lousy writer. There are some efforts i do like but they constitute a very small part of the crap i have dished out over the years. Come to think of it, i have forced my friends to read all of it. So if you are reading this and thought the same way, i am truly sorry. I always believed that penning your thoughts is all that matters. The words should flow and the content would take shape no matter what. That's what happens always. I start writing something and then without thinking where it is heading, i simply keep adding random words to try and make sense but mainly to fill up space. That is probably why most of my writings are loquacious. 

I have many times recounted the pain i have been through in my articles and poems and have been scolded by one and all to cheer up. But sadly, it is when i am sad that the best works come out. If i'm writing in a jovial mood, it usually is pretty idiotic. Tragically, i can''t seem to find words to write anything meaningful every time i feel sad. So this has made me wonder, what it will take to write something good. Does it have to be physical pain or emotional. If the latter then of what kind? An analysis of the past shows that love has got something to do with it. It is the heart burn, the pain inside that tears one apart which causes something good to come out. I believe i'm right as that what great artists too like to say. I recently saw 'Rockstar' the hindi movie and was impressed with how the protagonist was able to take pain and translate into soulful music. 

It's a movie and we are made to believe that is what some would say but i disagree. I think the concept holds merit. I'm no rockstar but i know how inspiring pain can be. How it can  let you push your limits and bring out the best along with the worst. The anger and the hate manifest themselves in different forms that are borne by those near to us. The pain however, manifests itself into art. That's how the wheels of life keep moving. Not all  music, poems, art are filled with pain though and yes the artist can be in a good mood to produce a masterpiece but i am sure that no. won't be a large one. I have used it as one to write some well written though uninspiring articles while getting mad at my family for no reason at all.

All this analysis has brought one interesting fact forward i.e. how i am able to calm myself down by writing or listening to music. I believe it is because these media allow me to express the real me unafraid, unabashed and quite vocal. Away from the scorching eyes and the comments, they allow me to be me. They are not just an expression but a part of me. That is why i feel it important for others to accept my choice of music and my writings. That is why i want them to read my articles as in a weird way i'm looking for acceptance. Some may call it dramatic but i guess i'll settle for artistic. True the portion of art is hugely limited but the point is delivered I guess. So as i wrap up this article and send it across for my friends to read, I am sure i will hear a chuckle or two but largely it would be overlooked. But that is fine with me as it has been a learning experience nonetheless for me.

Divided India

I wasn't planning on writing on this page today. In fact it wasn't even on my mind. Browsing through FB i caught hold of some blog by a girl and started reading it (I don't know anything about the girl). After reading her article which i found to be quite inflammatory, i thought i'd comment but then I looked at the 227 comments already there. I again thought that this must be an old article that's why the high no of comments but then i see that the first comment was posted only 2 days ago. So i started reading a few comments and they were people expressing their views either towards the author or a community or others. To be very frank i wanted to comment on how i feel that what has been written is all wrong and how could anybody post something like that and that the author should go check out her own backyard before commenting on others etc. etc. But then being me i couldn't bring myself to write something that's just gonna get washed away in the barrage of comments the page is getting.
However, i couldn't stop myself from posting my 2 cents on the discussion (though i didn't take names or any sides). This prompted me to take a look at my own blog and what's going on and i see that my last entry got only 1 comment :(. Now i know that there are other biases at play and yeah probably my writing or for that matter my choice of topics is not as impressive. So i read my last 2-3 articles and came across one that i wrote on hate. I had mentioned how people in general usually don't hate stuff (though they might say so) but they tend to highly dislike it. I had built my prose on the promise that hate is a very strong feeling and you need to be hurt really bad to hate somebody or something. But going through the webpage and the comments mentioned on that webpage i realized that what i wrote was from my perspective and it would be folly to generalize it.
The content was highly degrading, immature and self centered to say the least and it made me sad to know that a literate (not educated mind you) girl could have expressed such ostentatious comments which clearly reek of high levels of irresponsibility. At this point i would like to mention that we say we are one nation and that everyone is a proud Indian, but I don't think that's true. We are a nation as recognized by the world and tried to accomplish by the Britishers during their reign but sadly we are still a lot of small pockets of people following a particular theme or way of life secluded from everything else. The only point perhaps we can say we are one nation and that we stand together in unity is an India-Pakistan cricket match. Makes you feel sad doesn't it. Many would call this as unity in diversity but my friends we do not have unity. Cracking jokes and taking potshots in a good humorous manner are all  acceptable but that is not the case when you go talk to people about such stuff.
What you get if you have the courage to dig deeper is complete sense of ignorance, condescension, disregard and at many times, pure hate. Be it how people from north term anything below Maharashtra as south or people from the southern states calling everybody above Maharashtra as Punjabis, we have to acknowledge the fact that there is hardly any respect these days among people for each other. This divide based on region, caste, religion, social status etc is really appalling and it then  makes me sad to hear the words one nation, one country from the same people who practice all this. Yes i'm talking about stereotypes and eliminating them from our lives might be impractical if not impossible, agreed. But do we really need to hate somebody just because they come from a particular region or speak in a particular way? These issues have existed with us even before the Mughal rule. India then too was conglomeration of small kingdoms fighting among themselves to gain few pieces of land and it still is.
Now, is there someone to blame for the mess we are currently? Yes lots and lots of people, but how do you individually attribute the cause to them? I mean, how can you tell Aurangzeb that he ruined the good work done by Akbar (in some respects though) in soothing out Hindu-Muslim relations? Or for that matter, today's political bigwigs for failing to address this rot. Fact is, you know things could be better and you want them to be but nobody is willing to take the next step. Status-quo is what people want and don't want to be bothered with anything although it seems a fairly decent discussion topic over tea and chips. People seem to have lost hope in the system and just want to live as per their own wishes. Coming back to the article in question, i feel that the author acted irresponsibly in allowing her post which might be considered inflammatory to be spread around like a media campaign. Motives can be questioned and failure to take any notice of the deterioration in the discussion on the topic is unpardonable.
So this reinforces my point that we live in a divided India with people not ready to accept other people's existence and always following regionalism, casteism, communalism etc. Words can't begin to describe the dismay i feel right now. We talk about inclusive growth and growing economy and growing literacy rates but what good is all that if we don't get educated? By educated i mean learning to know what is right and what is wrong. This concept if  applied to all aspects of our life can transform an entire generation if not the nation and that would be a huge achievement. I know i'm being idealistic here and being a professor of practicality it goes against my nature but seeing the woeful condition of affairs i am begging for it all to at least slow down and take a break. After all where will this hatred take us? Will we in 20 years time end up as 30 odd independent nations? A frightful thought but a possibility nonetheless. Is there anything we can/must do?
I request all the readers of this article to think over this thought and ponder on where we are heading. If in anyway you agree with me, please spread the word and try to be a countryman first before being a region/religion/caste strong man. Please lets change the way we think.....................

Hate

Hate is a very strong word. Somebody must have wronged you or someone you love very bad for you to develop such a feeling. There is a big difference between you not liking something and you really hating it. There are many things that one may not like but hate is something different, something what the jihadis have for India or Palestine for Israel. So if you get a measure of what i am trying to say then you would appreciate the fact that it is something very personal and emotional. I know many of you feel that i 'hate' almost everything but actually its more like not liking those things and there are very few things i actually hate. I don't like any good thing that happens for the people/things i hate and i cringe at the very thought of such things and you can say i hate those people who promote such things. So where am i going with all this? Today i want to talk about the thing i hate on God's green earth.
Throughout its more than 130 years of existence Congress party of India has been the single major political force in the country and still remains a fierce opponent. But if we take a look at the years of rule the country has spent under them then it paints a sad story. Had it not been for the heroics of the revolutionaries under Azad, Bhagat Singh and others (sadly whose name i can't remember) we would have been under the british rule for another 25 years. After independence, Nehru let the democratic system to rot to such an extent that corruption became another word for bureaucracy. No wonder the biggest scams and controversies always involve a congress leader or a strong ally. Bofors (64 crores), JMM bribery case, Madhu Koda (4000 crores), Sharad Pawar's food scam, Commonwealth 2010 (30000 crores unofficially), 2G scam (>1 lakh crores) and countless others that probably have not come to light. Sadly though all are yet to be proven in the court of law Each one where the country lost its millions to Swiss bank accounts.
If corruption was not enough decisions of the leaders in power have scarred the nation for the worst. Be it Nehru for rejecting UNSC permanent seat, supposed creation of LTTE by Rajiv Gandhi, still to be judged massacre of sikhs by Tytler, emergency declaration by Indira Gandhi, reported atrocities by Sanjay Gandhi etc. One great leader once said that all congress wants is to stay in power, they don't care what's the status of the country or where it is heading. So true if you consider what potential we had and what we are currently at. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying they are fools or anything. In fact I think they have some of the best minds in this country. It would take a lot to carry out plans for such big frauds and devising strategies to make the right kind of noises before elections to win the seats. That's what makes congress a deadly opponent because they know how to influence voter opinions. Sure, congress supporters will come up and say that they have done so much for the progress of the country which i'm not ready to acknowledge here. The GDP growth, standard of living etc etc. and of course the fallacies of other political parties (BJP, Shiv Sena, Left etc etc.)
First lets talk about the other political parties. I'm not saying they are good or better than congress but there are levels which i am willing to accept. I don't condone Godhra and it saddens me to think of it even but apart from that there are fewer scams and controversies connected to them and hence i would say choose the lesser of the two evils. Second, the growth the country has seen in the last decade. To be honest, i feel that it began with the Vajpayee government. That paved way for world to acknowledge that India is the next destination and that GOI will act favorably to investments. Congress, just carried forward those policies and built on that groundwork to take India to where it stands today and this again refers to my initial point of making the right noises at the right time. there have been instances of the public not happy with the way govt. functions but come election time those issues are brushed aside and a rosy picture is painted to fool the public. Brilliant minds at work i would say.
So i guess by now you knowthat i hate the very existence of the congress. I can never forgive it or its leaders for the loss they have brought to this country. I know many would not agree with me but I'm not writing this to please/convince anyone. This is what i feel and nothing can change that. I wrote it because i wanted to as this is something personal and important to me. 

A Second Coming

Ok i'm back after another 2 months in isolation. Remembering those times when i used to write something every week. Though in the past i have written on politics and sports and entertainment but somehow i don't want to do that today as there's already been written too much about all the recent events. But there is something i think that deserves attention and it is the ability of film makers to go beyond the ordinary and produce a gem of an item. Going back 7-8 months, there was Christopher Nolan's INCEPTION which left everyone wanting for more and simply unsure of whether they are real or living some dream. As impressive that movie was, i came across another great movie in Source Code. I am a fan of human intellect and when people can produce great works of art like these movies it surely makes for great viewing. 

Such movies force you to use your mind and make you think and question your existence. The very essence of why you are here and what purpose you serve on this earth. It makes me wonder and going back to the days of Matrix, whether what i'm feeling is real or just some program being run to make me believe in something that actually is fake. Nonetheless it has its own excitement and thrill attached to it. But believe me, that euphoria is usually short lived. I mean you can sit and think about the meaning of your existence only for so long. There will come a time when you will move on and venture back into the daily routine of your life. The routine that we all love and something we set ourselves into and any deviations from it just don't seem that interesting to follow. 

A change of scenario though at times is quite welcome and this brings me to the second part of what i want to talk about here today. The first year of MBA is over and as i sit in my seat at the office i am doing my internship in, i just can't fail to remember the 4 years i spent in Pentair. The car pool to and from office. The endless early morning discussions. The call to breakfast table (thanks to Lord Gulati). Eating lunch together an d of course the wonderful feeling of TGIF!!, a phrase made popular by the movie Bheja Fry!! So i sit at my desk and wondering at times what i'm doing here and surely missing all the wonderful times i spent in my last organization. This makes me wonder how my life one year down the line would be? Will i have a group of friends to call my own and spend my time with?

There are other moments, other people in my life today that make it worthwhile but i sure miss those good old days and i don't know whether something like that will ever happen again. Looking forward to the coming times i know i'll be missing my friends a lot when they leave for Europe and there won't be much time left for us to spend together after that. So i guess what i'm trying to say through all this is that there are moments you would give anything to have back. Cherish those moments and make them count so that in future when you take a look back at what all you have done, these come and bring a smile to your face. I don't want to get preachy about it but i guess my second coming as a working professional has indeed awakened some memories and remembering those times has just made me a bit emotional. A temporary deviation from the routine and i know this phase would soon be gone too. So those of you who have had the patience to read all this i say thank you for listening to my thoughts and goodbye and have fun...!!!

Past, Present and the Future

B'day gone, New year gone, Valentine's day gone, so what is it that is making me write on my blog after almost 8 months? The fact that I wanted to write on it for so long but somehow didn't get the motivation to do it. I have wasted a lot of time during the last year doing nothing and gaining up on my weight with astronomical broadening of my belly. I mean I have grown really fat really quickly. Gone are the days when i could call myself slim. But fat is not the only thing i have added to my name recently. The continuance of poor academic performance and even poorer network (even in a batch of 450) have only helped in making the matters more unpleasant. Sure, there are some people i have really enjoyed being with and would never want to part company with them but it hurts to lose some of the good friends i had developed over the years. 

Life has been a roller coaster ever since i came here. With tussles for everything and me obviously too reluctant to do anything it took a lot to get what i wanted initially. Time has been a constraint to do a lot of things is what i tell others. But deep down i know that things could have been much different had i really decided on my priorities. Not a day passes when i don't dwell on how different i wanted things to be. People say that i complain a lot and that I'm never happy with anything but there must be some method to it is what i believe. For a person who doesn't like to point fingers and doesn't express his views too often, i still find the situations too damn sad to not comment and sit by the wayside. 

I mean where do i begin. Not a week passes with me not wishing of having got into another b-school and ruing the missed opportunities. Its the system here that makes my cringe. People not fit to manage themselves, heading an institute that shapes the careers of the country's future managers. The most mis-managed management school is what I'll put the name down as. From stupid rules and regulations to gross misuse of power. Students are not the first priority here with the administration living in a dream world of 80's. There is just so much pent up frustration that i don't know what i would do with all of it. Guess only thing that keeps me going is the company. Could write a book on why i hate being here but there are probably only 2-3 reasons why I'm still here that outweigh everything else. 

Now i don't mean that there is all sad and woeful moments in my life here. There have been really exciting times too when i have really let my hair down and enjoyed a lot and feel happy and thankful to god for allowing me to be a part of those activities. I have managed to do couple of things that i always dreamed about and it feels good knowing that. There are things to look forward to and the anticipation makes it worth the wait. But a question mark also hangs over my head as to if I'm like this right now, what will happen to me 6 months down the line when most of the people I'm close to will go on exchange leaving me feeling a bit lonely and sad. But sure that day will come too when we all will leave this campus and head towards our careers with new vigor and zeal.

Still, i feel like i am somehow not touching my full potential and as such there is a lot more than i can do with myself. There are goals i set for myself everyday but somehow fail to work towards even one single item. Have i just lost the plot and am just running for the sake of it to pass time? It's a costly way to pass time though i might add. but as i fail to achieve every target that i set, my resolve to meet my goals gets stronger and i know there will be a day when i will meet them and that day the shackles will break and i would probably be able to say that i have turned a new leaf. when that day will arrive is hard to say and will it be too late for me and what i have in mind is also not clear to me but all i really can do is try to work towards it and hope that i am able to achieve what i want.....

Groans and Excitement

Okay, so its been another month that has passed me by and come to think of it i can for a change do tell you a few things i remember about this time. The biggest news of all was my finally having laid hands on my long lost dream of getting into an IIM. So i have finally done what i had worked so hard for the last 4 years or so and right now sitting in my room in IIM I i can say that i am feeling excited but scared, happy yet sad and god knows what. I'm like a mixed bag of emotions. Couldn't have asked for more. Yes i'm concerned about a few people left alone back in Delhi and yes i miss a whole hell lot of people but still i'm learning to cope with it. The last 4 years flash before my eyes again and again whenever i'm alone doing nothing right from the time when i joined my company and screwed up on the first big test to the time when i was praised and appreciated, when i left the company, for all that i had done and accomplished in the last 4 years. It sure feels very good thinking about all this and all the experiences i have had during this time.
To be honest there were times when i really didn't want to work in my office but yes the last year has been very good and i do miss my office days. I knew it would be hard but still it does pinch moving away from a settled routine. But on the positive side i have found a new routine which is as much exciting. So it was hard to leave Delhi not knowing when i will be back for a long time again. I mean yes there will be breaks between semesters but 3-4 days max. First time i have stepped out of Delhi for what seems to be a really long time. Leaving my parents who have been always there with me. Leaving my friends and colleagues behind has been hard too. I miss the breakfast, Sanju's call for lunch at 12:30, then trying to find Gullu at 1 and holding the lift for him. I miss the trips to the cafeteria for coffee with JP and Vipinji.  The long drive back home via my favorite spot in Delhi - CP. Man writing this is making me so misty eyed.
So what i'm trading for all these moments and memories? I am trading a life of excitement, hardships, fun, sadness, happiness, disappointment. But i guess it was time to move on from my earlier life as i had promised myself that no matter what i would leave Delhi before this year ended. Not that i had gotten bored, but because i knew i needed to shake up my life and get certain things and people out of my system. So i delivered on my promise and here i am living with strangers and still a bit at home. Now as you might or might not know, the life at a b-school is tough. Cut throat competition for everything from marks to placements to GIRLS!!! So am i bothered? Hell yeah what do you take me for? Okay, a bad joke but yes i'm a little bit nervous but i know this is where i have to be for the next 2 years and i will manage somehow. In fact i would have to manage as it's not an option for me.
So lugging 5 heavy weight books and the weight of a lot of expectations, i begin my sojourn from this place right in the middle of the country. To make the path sweeter, i just got news that one of my good friends will soon be coming to Indore and yeah weekends will be special and a little better. In all this i forgot about the other big news, Spain in football world cup finals. How awesome is that? I supported Spain from day 1 although none of my friends agreed with me. I told everyone how this time its Spain time but no one agreed. Brazil, Argentina, Germany...even England, god knows what names were thrown up. This is not to belittle these teams but i had my faith in the team i support and i knew they will make it. So i guess now i can be bashful and go on to say that people who watch football once in 4 years have no right to predict the winners. Sorry if it hurt someone's feelings but i can't help it, I'm so happy. Desperately waiting for tomorrow night's final between two really good teams. Watching with so many people together will only add to the excitement.
So here i am, writing my first article from this city of great cuisines and telling everyone that i am fine and that i miss them a lot. Keep in touch is all i can add. Guys don't forget me and do keep calling on a regular basis on my new no. I'm a student now, so don't expect me to call damnit :P :P. This is me signing off. Tc and NJOI!!!!!!!!!!

Movie Time

Ok maybe not an apt title for this article but i felt i needed to write something about RAAJNEETI. There was a lot said and written about the movie even before it was released, with the only national party in the country slapping a one week ban and what not. But i was sure i would enjoy the movie simply because it was made by one of my favorite directors - Prakash Jha. Prakash has the uncanny knack of delivering high octane movies with gripping performances by his leading stars. Apharan and Gangajal standout as the master pieces based on the hindi heartland politics of the country and needless to say i love them. So the movie was released to much fan fare and people were disappointed to some extent on what had been portrayed. Maybe they expected something else or maybe the plot was all to predictable for them and yes their opinions were heard and carried forward to many others.
People saw the similarity between the movie and the epic Mahabharata and labeled the movie as a spin-off, opinions though harsh but yet accepted. There was appreciation for the performances and meatier roles for Ajay and Nana was what everyone called for. But i stayed away from commenting and following all this news as i was sure that i would love the movie. And god damn i did. It was a stupendous movie with great effort put in by everyone. Yes there were some similarities, yes it might have been too predictable at times. Yes it went overboard in the end but people lets not forget it was not that this wasn't told to us earlier. Much like when RGV said he made Sarkar as an ode to the Godfather, Prakash Jha also came out and said how he had adapted the Mahabharata to the modern political scene.
So it was all there before us. And i have to admit, it was a great movie. Prakash once again delivers a great movie with edge of the seat action. Agreed having known Mahabharata it felt like being cheated but one must understand that it is a totally different ball game to make the actors follow the directors' lead. To bring out the kind of performances especially from Arjun Rampal would have taken a lot. Lets face it Arjun has never been good at acting but he shines through in the movie. Goes to show what skills Prakash Jha has. I loved the movie and am happy that i didn't listen to the naysayers and maintained my belief. This i believe is something i should do more often, believing in what i feel is right.
When Vishal Bhardwaj made Kaminey, many critics slammed the movie stating it wasn't that good. But having received a similar criticism for Omkara and then knowing how good a movie it really was, I was sure Kaminey too would be good and i was not let down. Vishal did justice to the script and the actors supported him. He did give us a good film with good music. What more can you ask for? So one thing i would follow from now on is go and watch a movie without thinking too much about what others are saying. I know that there are some movies you can definitely miss based on opinions just because they are too bad to begin with. But the movies that are good always make the right noises before they are released and they have the right stars in them. Thats what one should really look for and i'm sure you will never feel let down.
The biggest plus point with Raajneeti though is that even though the story might seem clichéd to few, it still doesn't ask you to fore go logic to move through the movie. This is one point that helps you ease through as the movie progresses. Hence, all in all a wonderful movie and a great time spent and a really happy critic!!!!!!!!!!

Sweet Little Annoying things!!!

This is not a happy effort. This is more of a complaint. Not of mine alone but of the millions other who face these problems everyday in their life. The small stuff in our lives that we don't know what to do about yet makes us irritated all the time. This article is dedicated to highlighting the frustrations that we face everyday and are helpless bystanders, no matter what the revolutionaries claim is the righteous thing to do in such circumstances. I'll start of with the most common problem plaguing the country.
1. Corruption: A bribe here, a bribe there. All in getting your work done easily, quickly, without hassles. Tata Tea has run the campaign for quite some time.."khilana band, pilana shuru". A touching campaign, yet not very successful. The deplorable state of the country's administration and the law and order situation in different parts of the country leaves a sore heart every passing minute. Be it the lack of getting the paperwork done or seeing your soldiers dying a dog's death at the hands of psychopaths, it hurts like hell. Why can't the people running the country understand that their is something called patriotism beyond their greed for green paper? The one thing our forefathers had in them when they fought the british for the country. Vote bank politics has long denied the country the growth and justice it deserves. The public demands for a clean administration with proper implementation of law have always fallen on deaf ears.
2. Power and Water: Or rather the lack of it. Every day you face the same issue. Water will come at odd hours and not for long time at that. So you have to get up at 3 am to fill that bucket of drinking water which will help you survive the next day. In spite of all this, the govt's apathy towards ensuring that each citizen gets drinking water everyday is simply inexorable. Coupled with the hassles public faces with electricity and the inflated bills just cripples the backbone of the common man. How are you expected to live a normal life when you don't have basic civic amenities at your disposal. It hurts to see the state of people in the rural areas living their lives and then resorting to violence to make their voices heard. Are we not dividing our nation based on petty differences. Education is not a compulsory right as it should be. Lack of knowledge breeds ignorance and a disregard for rules and authority, specially in the urban areas.
Law & Order: Traffic problems, road rage, robbery, rape, molestation, dacoity and what not. These are just some of the news that you read everyday in the papers. You see something on the news - dramatized, sensationalized yet forgotten from living memory in a couple of weeks as the channels look for some other news to exploit. The very fact that the police is not there to protect the people and looks for its own benefits makes you cringe and twist like a snake struggling to free itself off its captor. Daylight robberies and the pathetic condition of the police force coupled with their ignorance and greed only makes your anti system sentiments grow.
People say that if you hate the system so much then why not fight to change it? Yes it is true, but how many of us are capable of such deeds? How can we even enter political scenario without slashing someone's throat or cutting someone's pocket? Am i too coward to stand up? Is my patriotism some hollow joke? I don't know, maybe i need a leader whom i could follow to do all that is required of me for my country but as of now, I stand alone. Maybe the belief that if you do try to change the system, you will be crushed like an ant makes me stop short of taking any drastic step. But yes the resentment is there. I'm not ignorant of the country's problems and i find my solace in these words, which makes my life easier. But is that enough? An easy life for me (as i don't normally have to deal with these problems), while the rest of the country is hurting......

Most Wonderful Experience

Almost two months since i last wrote on this blog and my world has definitely turned upside down. My sordid love saga with its own twists and turns maybe bigger than a Abbas-Mustan movie has come to curtains finally. My office shifted premises to NOIDA making travelling a bitch and that too all alone. Still no idea where i am headed in my career. So all in a all not a very happy last two months to look at from my side. Can't say the same for the others though as few might just have something exciting and interesting to look forward to especially after European skies have opened up. There is the general dismay among 'friends' as to why the bloody hell am i single (ain't u got no guts?). Then there is my own explanation of it (ain't got no luck). Not something good to write home about here it seems.
Wait a minute, there just might be i guess. Does crashing down on waves in a rubber raft and jumping from 30 ft high cliff into the river below and then standing under a gushing waterfall and feeling the water hitting you with bricks and stones and yet enjoying the experience, count as exciting? It sure as hell does, baby. Well this trip was the brainchild of our very own Bhatia (saab) and slowly all the players fell in through persuasion (if not bribe) save one. Hours of discussion to finalize the details and the itinerary went into the short trip and it would be right to say that every one was excited. So where do i even begin with this journey. The torturous train ride where we were forced to play cards in the dark and yet being yelled at in the middle of the night for having some fun or the fact that the train took almost 5 hours more to reach its destination. It's still fresh in the mind how each moment unfolded and although there were no untoward experiences, the trip was still quite Adve-ntur-ous.
Surely a ride in an ambassador through the fields with 8 people jammed in somehow was an experience of its own but the best part of the trip i believe was the water.


I mean the freshness of water was simply awesome. The cold temperature adding to the flavor. So what began as an adventure was soon turned into an experience of a life time. Whatever i had craved for to do all my life came together in a single trip. Bonfire at night with light music in the background, good food, great company for my part at least and of course the cards. So tired from the long journey, we still managed to play some shots for the benefit of Lalit Modi before heading for a dip in the river near the camp. The night passed by with lots of fun under the light of a lantern and warm cups of tea in our hands.
Saturday morning, 17/04/10 9:50 hrs: This is when we began what we all termed as THE BEST EXPERIENCE of our lives so far. Getting into a rubber raft and terrified of the water, still i desperately wanted to have this experience. Up it went (raft) as our guide yelled,"Forward team forward, fast, fast, ok relax." Up and down the 8 rapids we went from Roller Coaster to the Golf Course. All the time water splashing in our faces as our raft fought the waves and we rowed on as if our lives depended on it. No wonder we felt like the crew of a sunken ship in a small boat, trying to reach the coast, while mother nature is hell bent on destroying all our hopes. Water surfing at the end seemed like a walk in the park after the rapids though it did require some amount of cajoling from my inner self. To cap off the wonderful experience was the cliff jumping where i, afraid of even entering a pool, jumped from a 30 ft  high cliff into the river and trying desperately to float with water in my nose and mouth managed to reach the land with pride and happiness scrawled all over my face.
No matter what adjectives i use, they won't be able to justify what i and in fact all of us felt after that 2 hour journey down the river. Surely it was an experience of a life time and no wonder i want to do everything all over again. One thing i did learn in all this is that there is a gambler in all of us and yes everyone is capable of witty or poisonous remarks. Its how we bring these qualities out makes us who we are. Compatibility and adaptability is an over sold concept i believe in all management schools as everyone can do all that to live. Having said that we had a great group to ourselves with current and future managers in the mix. So it was a big surprise to see no ego clashes among the dominating members of the group. Well it doesn't befit me to take pot shots at others while sitting in the confines of my comfy living room but i have learned not to let go of an opportunity as after all, "waat usse lagti hai jo rasta hum chorte hain."
So next stage of the journey began with a trip to Mussorie although this time the ride was much more comfortable in a scorpio. Trip down the mall road was quite an experience too with loads and loads of beautiful things to see. Sadly none of them were single and ready to mingle. So ogling at those beauties was all that we could manage through the night. Of course we did try out a few new styles.

Needless to say Colgate could use new brand ambassadors. Shyness is a word of the old millennium so it would seem. Self Obsessed would be an understatement :)

The  night was wasted away at another round of cards and allowed me to silence my critics once and for all regarding the skill. Sunday morning wanted me to stay put in bed but sadly the lure of water fall and the biggest attraction of Mussorie was much too big to miss out on and yeah in order to keep the spirit of the trip, "Itna toh banta hai." (courtesy: Raju Srivastava)

So off we went after a not so healthy breakfast of paranthas with butter and heavy glass of lassi to the Kempty falls. So there we were 7 guys half naked standing in waste high cold water and lots of dirt. Felt like being beaten by brick-bats by the falling water but still it felt great to stand under the numbing water. Kempty falls did make me realise how unfit my body really is and that how much fat i had accumulated on my once slim body :( But not trying to dwell too much on this insignificant part of the trip (weight watching i.e.) we began our long and tiresome trip to Delhi only to be delayed by a massive traffic jam. Tired and weary we reached CP at 2 in the night and i must admit saadi dilli looked awesome in the night lights.

This brought curtains to our almost 4 day long journey along the banks of river Ganges and in the hills of the Queen of Mountains and surely left me longing for more.............. 

The Most Wonderful Things in Life

So another Valentine has gone by and i am still all alone after 25 years of existence. Some might say that it's all downhill from here, but i say that it's the heart that should stay young and the body will keep up somehow. So hoping for a better future i'm gonna stop thinking about this and reflect on what really makes us happy in this world today. Of all the melodrama and tension in our lives, we do have our moments of happiness. Point is whether we recognize them and give them their due or do we ignore/neglect them altogether. So in this exercise today, i'm going to chronicle what makes me happy (yes i'm not grumpy all the time) and please feel free to add things that i might have missed.
#1: God: I may not be a religious guy but i do think i'm spiritual. I know my faith is strong and i know that god is there for me and the others. All you have to do is stand up and ask for him. My belief is what probably keeps me sane at times. I don't believe in demarcation along religious lines as i feel that there is only one god and rest all that we humans worship are just incarnations of the supreme lord. So spiritual yes... religious no.
#2: Family: Yes i feel happy being around my mom and dad. Though i don't spend a lot of time with them but still they remind me of what i used to be and how much i have changed over the years while they have labored on year after year with the same set of feelings towards me. That in itself feels so good to have with me but still makes me sad that i have let them down by placing other things as more imp in my life than them.
#3: Football: Maybe i'm still not at that level where each Liverpool victory calls for a treat and each defeat calls for mourning but i still love it when they win and it just makes the day a bit sweeter. Plus giving kaif a piece of my mind on the rivalry just adds that spice to the recipe.
#4: Music: It brings together souls or so i have heard. But i do believe that music is an awesome stress buster. There was a time when the first thing i did after logging on to my system was open a music player. But these days i have lost track of it somehow. I don't have it with me when i travel and at times i don't listen to it on my comp even. Maybe my list has just gone old and there aren't a lot of good and new songs out there. But still i would say that music helps me vent out my frustrations in a big way. So again its something that brings a smile to my lips.
#5: Friends: Last but the most important thing in my life. I have valued friendship far more than any of the 4 above mentioned points. I have sacrificed my rest time, my responsibilities, my job almost everything for friendship. I have suffered the scorn of many for my devotion and been hurt too at times by my friends. Nevertheless, i now who i can count on to be there with me in any form possible when i need them and thankfully god has blessed me with the right kind of people to be there for me. When all my chips are down and i don't have anything going for me, i know there will be a voice of support and encouragement which would try its best to cheer me up without even saying so. That's why i continue to support my other friends in their troubles. I have few who are there for me so i want to be one of the few who is there always.
Yes my list comprises of very obvious points and nothing spectacular but that's what my life is - good but nothing spectacular. So bear with me and don't chastise me for being emotional/critical (at times). Hope you enjoyed this another rendition of self discovery. Till next time....HAVE A NICE DAY
P.S. - Please feel free to add what you think makes you happy in life apart from what's already here.

Love is in the Air

The warmth and the heavenly feeling called Love. Yes i am back with another article on a topic that many would say i have really killed out here. But i would beg to differ with them. I have only tried to explain what has been going on with my life in all my past articles. But rest assured this article is not on me. This is about love. A song from the movie Saudagar went like, "ILU..ILU..ye ILU ILU kya hai ye ILU ILU." For the uninitiated, that of course means "I Love You." Well the second week of Feb has always been associated with love and all the emotional and senti feelings that go along with it. It is that time of the year that makes the roses and gifts costly and provides a timely boost to the economy in terms of the gifts being purchased.
Many people look forward to this week all through the year. Either to express their love or to let the person know that how much they care or at times just to say that they are there for them. Of course the tip is towards love. Now i'm not going to venture into why people fall in love and why they do all this as this is something no body can control. What i want to talk about is whether it's all worth it. I mean people go through the ritual/arduous task of selecting gifts and then doing something special for their loved ones for what. Does this week really carry that much importance? If yes, then why? Why is this week so special? Does love demand a special day for you to express it? Does love ask a special method for it to be expressed?
I don't think so. Agreed, you may term me a lazy pig not wanting to do anything for a change. But i still stand by my point that you shouldn't need a specific day to express your love. Every day with your loved one should be special for you and if it is not then you are just not that into the relationship. Love is not about big gifts and big expressions (well it is but not entirely). Love primarily is about the small stuff. The warm snug, the  holding of hands while crossing the road, the shoulder to rest the head, the caring for a pin prick etc. These are the small things that make a relationship strong and you don't need a special week to do all this stuff. Yes gifts are important but you don't have to wait for a week to give them.
And this is not just about Valentine's day, it goes for all the special days that are celebrated. Be it Mother's day, Father's day, Friendship day etc. I don't need some card company to tell me the day to express my love to my loved ones. For me every minute spent with them is special. I think that's what everyone should realize too. Try and make these moments count and you don't have to wait for a special day to say that you care. In fact if I may say so, the card and gift industry might be missing out on a bigger piece of pie here. After all if you declare every day of the year as special then there might just be an increase in the sales owing to the feeling of love being ubiquitous. Yes it might seem strange but best ideas initially seem strange :). So you ask then how do i express my love everyday...three letters...ILU................

3 Mistakes of My Life!!

An article that has been long in the making. Tried so hard to write something but couldn't actually find three noticeable decisions that i really regret in my life. So it was a surprise when suddenly, out of the blue they fell into place. 3 Decisions that i regret to have taken in this short span of 25 years, though most of the decisions were taken by my parents till i reached 15th. So here it goes:

Mistake #1: Choosing Non-Medical in XIth

It would be somewhat wrong to say that i am happy having done engineering. I don't say it is my worst decision but in hindsight it is not one of the best either. My sis told me."You should take commerce." But having seen my bro and sis take Science, i felt it wouldn't suit me to go do something else. So there in all my ignorance of what might lie ahead, i took the plunge. I always wanted to be popular and i lost out on that because of being too uninformed. To state that i was consigned to the unnoticeable bench would be an understatement. I lost out on all chances of popularity. So what did that translate into? Limited contact with good looking girls. Limited chances of lot of people knowing you and of course, minimal chances of getting a girlfriend. Engineering led me away from the happening crowd of Delhi. Thus giving way to becoming honorary member of FOSLA - Frustrated One Sided Lover's Association.

Mistake #2: Letting go of the Golden Opportunity

There she was. Standing 10 feet away on the very first day of college on the bus stand. Her arms clung to her chest. Looking radiant in that bright yellow top. Looking a bit lost and a bit scared with all the attention, comments and looks. To know she lived en route my home and traveled in the same bus should have given me enough confidence to go and talk to her. But surrounded by people who scared the living daylights out of me with their comments, i decided to stay mum. I saw her everyday. I felt i should go talk to her as she looked like somebody who needed a friend. Alas, the low self confidence routine overtook me or rather i should say, overpowered me into submission and i let things pass, trying to build up the courage to go and talk to her. Then one day in pouring rain, i saw her and her friend , who by the way was also hot with another friend of mine. Tragically, my friend used to live near my place. So there she was with him and i being the dumb a*****e lost out on, first getting a girl. Second, becoming popular. Third, having a life. What more could i do to myself to make my life suck even more.

Mistake #3: Company

TCS after giving some nervous moments, recruited me on the very first day of placement results. Along came a company at the fag end of the year. Surely, it was an interesting job, good pay, good take home salary. Possibility of meeting girls in corporate culture, it was quite alluring. Yet it took all of 4 months in the job to remove the screensaver and see the ground reality. From July to Dec, i wanted to switch. But i hung on. My mind told me to see things in future and how this spell would translate into the future. So i decided to stay. I told myself that if MBA clicks then fine, if not then i'll move. I have still to move after 4 long years. Part of the crew, part of the ship...Pirates of the Caribbean. Guess i'm just becoming the same here. Scary vision i must say. Coupled with lack of proper vision. Nice recipe for disaster and thats just what i feel my life has become. An utter failure on all fronts. People thought i won't amount to anything and i used to laugh at them. Guess i have proved them right.

So my first decision led me to college where my second decision consigned me to unnoticeable group which wasn't all that pleasant. Lastly, my decision on the company has clearly shown what an utter disaster my life has turned out to be. No girlfriend, no money, no career. Shot myself in the foot not once, not twice but three times in the past decade. How's that for accuracy? Never miss a chance to make my life hell...............

P.S. - All stories are fictional and bear no resemblance to any person or thing living or dead.

Break Up Saurabh!!!!!

Shankar Mahadevan sang - Wake Up Sid. I would like to hum a different tune though, its Break Up Saurabh. Well I know it doesn't rhyme but who cares. After a long long time I'm happy and I mean I'm truly happy. I feel light as if the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders. I know I have said this before and yet with in couple of weeks i am back to my usual sulking self and i know that many of you reading this article would not believe me when i say that this time there won't be a relapse. But I would like to assure all my well wishers that this time it's for real. I'm ecstatic right now. I feel the same way as i felt after giving IIFT interview. Totally free with not an iota of care in the world. I feel like i have taken a rebirth. There is a lot of positive energy flowing through me right now. And it's all got to do with one person. I won't name her but you guys know who I'm talking about. She finally said no, never ever.

Now you must be thinking that poor chap is going crazy because of grief. In fact many would go crazy. But i am happy because i had allowed myself to be something i wasn't. I was becoming just too much of a grump. Snapping at people for no particular reason. Always feeling down and dejected. Criticizing myself and blaming her for my being in this state and what not. I had become so awful that i had started to hate myself for being such a sadist. Worse part is i was driving her away from my life because of my complaints and negative attitude. This was definitely something i didn't want. We are good friends and i will try my best to be that. But I'm not forecasting anything yet. Although it would be fair to add that my decision also stemmed from the fact that she was developing feelings for someone else. So a combination of a lot of factors has resulted that i am a free bird now or as SAK said in LAK - "Khula Saand".

It would be wrong to say that i didn't see this coming. I had been told to do this by a couple of friends this past week or so but i was apprehensive. I didn't want to give up. I didn't want to admit that i lost. My male ego was dominating me to not accept defeat in any form. There were other signs too. My daily horoscope would once in a week tell me to let go of that relationship. But i never cared. I always fought to try and make this work. I believed that by doing all this i might move her around to saying yes. But there was definitely a part of my that said that if through all these efforts, she did say yes then won't she be making a compromise and settling for something she might not actually want? Where will that leave me then? In a relationship where she is not happy to be with me and i am still unhappy being with her. I didn't want that in my life. Who would? So i knew something or the other must give way. Either she would accept me whole heartedly or reject me sumptuously. And that's what she did.

So here i am standing on the road to nowhere right now. I know it would be tough and that this euphoria might not last long but i also know that with a couple of friends who really care with me by my side i would survive this phase. Hell i have been through worse things before and yet i am still standing, ain't i? I know if she reads this then i might lose what ever relationship i still have. But this is specially for you dear that try and be happy for me knowing that i am moving on from you as you have always wanted and that i am not letting our friendship go. It will remain as strong as ever. You definitely have to believe me on this as there is no other way i can assure you of this. That being said don't think for a moment that i am harboring any ill feelings as i simply can't. So this is me signing off on the first article of 2010 saying goodnight and goodbye to all the readers. Saurabh has left the building...........